Monday, June 22, 2009

Snuggie electrical storm

Thanks to my Mother-In-Law the Cookster household now has its own Snuggie. And before I go too far, we are very grateful for the new addition... Mrs Cookster is looking forward to many snuggie nights ahead.

Me? Well, let me just say straight up that if the Snuggie was a restaurant, it would be a pie van at the local football ground as opposed to a fine diner. It is in a word, NOT snuggie.

It is advertised as a convenient blanket replacement, but it's not blanket material. In fact it's felt. Mrs Cookster says it's "fleece", but that would be fleecing the truth somewhat. So felt it is and thin felt at that which isn't very snuggie at all.

However, the material is particularly good at building up static electricity. After two minutes of draping this material around my person, I began to generate my own micro-electrical storm. The air was fairly crackling with static, my hair was on end and *apologies to the weak of stomach here* even my chest hair was at 45 degrees. Every hair on my body was at attention, much to the disgust of Mrs Cookster who suggested a good waxing might be in order.

Of course, the kids were roaring with laughter at Daddy's clownish sci-tech display, but the two-year-old got the fear when a small lightning bolt shot out across the room and struck Dixie Marshall on the cheek. Okay, okay, I made this bit up.

It was only when the Western Power rep smashed through the front door trying to plug me in to the grid, to "harness my Snuggie potential" that I realised it was time to shed this quasi-religious static suit before someone got hurt.

Of course, it didn't take long to get it off, because it doesn't have a back. It's the hospital gown of leisure wear, designed for the person who likes to share their backside with the world. Thinking back to the TV ad, I can't remember seeing a whole lot of butt on display... a half ar5ed idea perhaps?

This is my considered opinion and even though some people clearly get off on the Snuggie phenomenon, a static-charged felt blanket with baggy arm holes and no arse covering is just not for me. Go figure?

I'm thinking the duvet suit might be more my style...

No comments: